Small Square

And so there I was looking out the window and just letting go of it all. I just let go. I cried and cried. I cried for the next two hours. I had hurt someone I love very, very much. I cried for that. I cried for my mother who still can;t make ends meet at age 52. I cried for people who had less than me. I cried for people who had more than me. And I cried some more. I have never cried so much in my life. I pealed away all these bullshit layers of rtationalization. I ripped the blankets off and it was cold.

So here we are in the wild of it all and trying to find what we want to do with our life, meaning mine.
What is right.
What is wrong.
Why do peple still insist on saying, "NOT".

I am moving in my existence. This is a new direction. I am challenging myself to become better than I am to be whom I should be. It is difficult for me to be this way. It hurts and just because I was raised a certain way, that was not good for me, doesn't me I have to live that way.

There is so,much going on that I cannot possibly write it all. Nor do I wish to. Until not then but the next time.

"Nobody told me how hard and lonely change is. - Joan Gilbertson