Anthropormorphizing American Politics

pic pilfered from Steve Colgan

As my scholarly readers know, the big word beginning the title of this entry means to ascribe human attributes to. And since I am referring to politics which involves people..it's not much of a stretch. But can these people, involved in making decisions for the rest of us (mostly poor decisions), be merely characterized as one simple thing?? And what would that be?? Certainly, such a complex process could not be limited to a single example. Except if you are talk about lemmings.

Yes, lemmings.

The cute little creatures who sling themselves to suicide under the theory of an absentee continent (which merely masks their shame at buying Menudo records) are the perfect symbol of our present political leaders.

1) President Bush: This little critter from Texas seems to want to find the highest point from which to fling itself. I suppose that some of his future endeavors will be to blame the economy on teenagers, save social security by offering merciful beheadings, and selecting judges from the Survey-Takers of America (to boost poll ratings).

2) Dick Cheney: This fella seems to be preoccupied chasing his tail and digging some kind of hole before plunging to his death. And if you look close enough he kind of looks like a rodent-face.

3) Donald Rumsfeld: With poor eye site this fella seems to have been picked on mercilessly. He runs around like he's got rabies and truly makes no sense when attempting to explain what he does every day.

4) Pat Robertson: Keeps telling people the end is near and he maybe right, as lemmings have poor eyesight. Is also responsible for the last round of senseless slaughter after telling a furried throng that their deity was over that cliff, beyond the clouds. Though he did mention that since not all the lemmings believed him The Furried One would not save them in case of an earthquake.

5) Katie Couric: Uh...actually she has nothing to dowith politics. I just want to see her run off a cliff.

Now the reason I am writing this is because the more I see the trend of American politicians whose actions are just atrocious, dispicable and dumb. I realize more and more that they just need to finish their nosedive and crash and get it over with.

Lemmings away!!